Not so fun experience, still I loved it...

by Olena B.
(Denver)

At first I hesitated to share my experience of BR my little Miracle, I left this site, and after thinking about it for a day, I have decided to write this.

After 6 months I had to stop BF because of some rare virus in my blood. It can cause leukemia and some other bad sickness later in life. So pediatrician advised to stop, but my gynecologist said that I should not be worried about it too much. It was so devastating for me! The information on this virus practically does not exist. I searched and searched the Internet, and found a few words on very small percentage of people actually getting sick with that virus present in their blood stream. And who knows if this runs in my family or I obtained it myself during my life. Some people can carry it and not get sick, others ( very small percentage) can get sick in their older years. It was enough for me to get very upset about those statistics. I cried and cried, then me and my hubby decided that 6 months is a good mark and I stopped. One thing I know for sure - my next child is going to be BF. It is essential for babies to get mama's milk!

Other than this horrible experience and knowing that I can not be sure about future health of my child, my BF experience was a challenge at first. My son did not want to or could not latch properly first two or three days. But lactation specialist reassured me that he has to learn how to do it too :-). Later, when I figured that I can alternate my breasts and excruciating nipple pain went away I WAS ENJOYING IT!!

At the beginning after each feeding I pumped a few ounces, but then amount was increasing, so I had freezer full of my milk in no time :-). Later, it all was thrown away because of the virus thing.

My little Miracle was a fast eater. I was happy to have those minutes with him. Time just for us! His little body against mine ( I always enjoyed skin on skin contact with him, I think he did too!), his little nose, that I had to watch, his little lips around my nipple, and chubby little fingers :-) all of it was the best thing that ever happened to me. I believe bonding while BF is the best for both of the mama and the baby. Maybe it fades away in time and child has no knowledge of it, but I remember all. This is the pleasure of the motherhood.